Hoping the New Year brings back the Old Fairy!

Hey Fearless Readers! Well. **coughs, sending up swirls of dust, brushes away cobwebs** Man. Have I been away for a long time or what? All the cheese is moldy in the fridge and all the fish are dead. It would seem two and a half years of constant writing is all I'm good for, because about the middle to end of writing The Last Unicorn Hunter in July of 2010, my mojo got up and went. I got excited about NaNoWriMo... for about three days, and then... pffft! I don't know exactly what happened, but my sewing box suddenly had more appeal than my Mac and my office chair. I've been cross stitching fairies and mermaids for the past four months.

Actually, that might not be true - the part about not knowing what happened to the el mojo. But be prepared: there is a lot of bitching ahead. Stick with me till the last paragraph, though, I'm going to try and redeem myself.

I've got some serious self-esteem problems and an almost strangling fear of looking like an ass. I sent out about 50 queries... and had not one single bite. Nothing. Nada. No one wanted to look at pages. I know that being a writer takes a lot of work and a lot of persistence. I know that on paper, at least. But the silence in the inbox... not just the silence, but the sucking sound of the wind filling the empty place the requests could have been, whistled through my ears. The wind started to sing to me, and all the songs were about how much I suck. How hopeless it is. How unprepared I am for publication, for an agent, for anything. You may know some of those songs yourself. So, like a kid who has just burned themselves on a hot stove, I pulled all my fingers back and put them in my pocket.

The other little thing that sort of turned me away from my usual activities was a question of genre. Silly thing, I know, but... no one wants to read about dragons and forests and treks anymore. Many of the agents (all carefully vetted, I assure you) said they didn't represent traditional fantasy. ??? yeah. They all represented at least one author that wrote traditional fantasy, and listed fantasy in their preferences... but...I'm not about to start sounding like the Rejection Queen. I queried agents I admire and want, and I still admire them, whether they want me or not. What's worse: I don't really think Jale of Dragonfael is very traditional fantasy (that's an obvious fail on my query there) but this was just another thing that sent my mojo into freefall and jammed my fingers farther into my pockets. I'll blog a little more about the Urban Fantasy question later on.

So. There is all my stupid whinging; my reasons for not writing and editing and so on and so forth, and I know how lame they all are. I know - it's pathetic. I know traditional fantasy is still being published. The Hobbit and Game of Thrones are being filmed or are in preproduction, for Heaven's sake! I know that a good book sells regardless of genre or fad. I know that if my query sucks, I have to keep at it until it doesn't suck anymore. I know that I am not a brilliant genius who deserves special treatment. But I'm being truthful here- and the point of this blog was a writer's journey. I'm sorry to say that some of that journey is spent acting like an ass and/or arguing at the ceiling. So, what I'm saying is *deep breath* I am done with my little fit and my little break. I am trying to get over myself, and get back at the books. I've got so many stories to write. No one else is going to write them. They may not get published... but I'd prefer they weren't left to chew their way out of my forehead noggin either!

So - /bitch. Below is how last year's goals shook out. I'm still deciding what to do for 2011. I have an awesome new idea I have called "Dark Spark" to write January and February, as well as spending one hour a day editing The Endways of the Gods, but the rest of the year is TBD.

Jan and Feb
Write The Endways of the Gods: a multidimensional fantasy/sci fi mix done Feb 10!
March
NaNoEdMo: edit The Spiritcaster done!
April
Finish the The Horses of Valdor FAIL! (sadly, this story just didn't work. No soup for you!)
Also: hoping to have Spiritcaster out to betas done!
May
Work on edits to Jale of Dragonfael, synopsis and query done!
June and July
Write The Last Unicorn Hunter - a fantasy done!
August
Edit Endways of the Gods FAIL!
September and October
Write Of Later Elves and Dragons - Urban Fantasy FAIL!
Nov and December
Write Road Dogs - a fantasy western of redemption and horror FAIL!

So. Here is to the New Year, and hopefully, the Old Fairy. The one that wrote every day and had most things in perspective. How is your perspective in the new year? (Or are you already calling me an idiot in the comments?! Don't do that!! I don't like it!! :) tee hee.....

The End of an Era. The Breaking of a Heart.

I feel like a piece of me died today. Seriously. I clicked this link and read it.

http://abclocal.go.com/wabc/story?section=news/local&id=7546764&rss=rss-wabc-article-7546764

To my horror, I learned of not only the end of the Roy Rogers and Dale Evans museum, but that Roy's beloved Trigger... is for sale. For money. Someone can slap down some cash and haul away Trigger. Put him in their garage. Hang bras and panties off him. String him with lights for Christmas. It makes me want to vomit. God only knows what's become of Trigger, Jr. who was also ..ahem.... mounted. (Yes, taxidermy is gross, I get that. Pipe down. I'm bearing my heart, here.)

I know that what Roy and his ilk represented was mostly about consumerism. Lunchboxes, tv shows, comic books, bedsheets, shower curtains. All these were churned out by the Hollywood machine - no different than the cheap toy you can get in your Happy Meal today when Michael Bay cranks out some fodder for the waiting sheep that we are, lining up to buy it. I know that the image of a cowboy in a shiny shirt that always kept his hat on while racing after the bad guy is nowhere near the real down and dirty cowboys of the old west who lived short brutal lives, or long, plodding, boring ones, tending cattle on the range far from towns or banks to rob. The singing cowboy was a nostalgic view, an emersion in things done the old way, when times were simpler. And of course, who doesn’t love to watch that 8 team stage coach go roaring around a curving mountain road, beset on all sides by outlaws and being chased by guys in white hats?

How did this happen? How did the museum of an American Legend go under? Yes. I used capitals for that. I believe it to be true. And in Branson! Missouri! The home of good ol’ country lovin’, church goin’, flannel wearin’ America. Is the West dying out? Is the love and the passion America had for its past, so much so that we invented imaginary cowboys, Indians and outlaws to worship long after the real ones had gotten jobs in the suburbs gone? Dying? Dead? Has the gloss and shine of the Mall of America cast its pall over the last shreds of the old west? The western novel is almost dead. There have been rumbles of a revival. But if the excellent novel The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford didn’t bring it back, I don’t know if it ever can. And now Roy Roger’s museum is gone and the items are being tossed out to the ravening crowds to bid on. It makes me kinda sick. There ought to be some sort of clause. When you buy a piece of American History...even if it is only a representation of the way America wants to remember its history, you should have to promise to maintain its dignity. Especially if it is a stuffed horse. Hasn’t Trigger suffered enough?

I can’t help but wonder what Roy would say.

Inspired by Kara

Here's the post that got me to blog again. :)

Sorry the blog has gone all dusty and whatnot. To be honest, I was flailing there for a period of two weeks. I did not make 50K last month, for the first time since I have found my new writing philosophy (ie: no excuses, 2k a day, time's a wastin' philosophy born NaNoWriMo of 2009). But I've pushed the count up to 53,696 for the Unicorn Hunter. I'm on track to finish this month. I have yet to do any more subbing, something I really need to do! I've come this far....

Right now, I am writing a story with unicorns. I won't say its about unicorns, but they are there and an important part of the story. My first novel was heavy, heavy on the unicorns and the pegasusususes. I love them. I can't get enough of them. Same with castles and princesseseses (I enjoy the buttkicking variety) and elves and prophesy and the dark space under the trees where danger lurks, and the long trek across the countryside from danger into darker danger, the wisdom of old men, the apple-red cheek of a country girl, the sword of limitless power, the crone that foretells destiny, the castle that isn't what it appears to be, the warlord that has an epiphany, the girl that does what she shouldn't despite the danger to her reputation, the mage that risks burning themselves out to develop their power, the knight that fights for his lady, the king that sacrifices himself for his kingdom, the queen that risks the kingdom itself to vanquish evil.

I have yet to get enough of any of it. Some people had imaginary friends growing up. I had a cast of thousands. Guess it was only a precursor for my love of epic fantasy.

I have two awards! Go figure!! The first is rather straightforward and has no strings attached.

It was given me by the loverly Aubrie http://authoraubrie.blogspot.com/ , and I think it very snazzy, indeed!!

Now the second has rules .

The “rules” for the award are:

Thank and link back to the person who gave you this award. That would be Claire Gillian, or Auburn Assassin at http://clairegillian.wordpress.com/
2. Share 7 things about yourself.
3. Pass the award along to 15 bloggers who you have recently discovered and who you think are fantastic for whatever reason! (No particular order…)
4. Contact the bloggers you’ve picked and let them know about the award.

7 things about me:

1. I love old houses/ buildings.

2. I watch a LOT of movies.

3. My girl crush is Jennifer Aniston

4. I used to have several fish tanks.

5. I have a sparkly fairy Barbie.

6. I also have a Halloween Barbie, witch costume and all.

7. I masquerade as a grown woman.

Now, the 15 new recipients. I’ll be honest, everytime I give someone an award they don’t usually accept it. I think finding 15 is a bit much... but here we go.

Kara

Aubrie

Aggy B

Race

Dan

Sarah

H. Mary Cole

Kathy

Jade

Alex

Polenth

Drying Ink

Adam

Jess

Tyhitia

A sense of humor can go a long way - or not

Sorry about the cheshire grin, folks. I have finally done it. I have sent out nine queries today. One was rejectified with lightening speed: It came smelling of fried neutrons it was so fast. I wonder if the amusing bio I put at the bottom had anything to do with it:

At the moment, I have no publishing credentials, but I am one of the few people living in the San Francisco Bay Area that was born here. I am already a statistical anomaly. Currently, I answer phones and perform feats of customer service and graphic artistry for a plumbing company. Believe it or not, this was never my childhood dream. I am willing to leave this all behind, or at least do it only part time, if I should ever have the luck to become a full time writer.

Yes. That was the bio I sent. And I'm not ashamed. Not even a little bit. I can't help it. I'm one of those people that spews out something (according to me) amusing whenever I get the chance. I reined it in most of the day, but I got a little loopy there at the end. Believe me, I kept it straight and narrow to all the agents who said things like: "We don't like it when you try and be cute, Shakespeare! Just get to the point!" But it was tough. I've got fingernail marks on my office chair. I'll let you know the horrific details as they become available.

How Goes It

Greetings! I'm writing you from June!! Yes. It's been too long since I blogged. First of all, I am on VACATION! The first one in many, many years. And I am spending it, not in some glorious locale, but in front of my computer. Where I usually am. Sigh. But this time, I'm using that computer time to gather intel on agents... and write the ever painful query. **shudders** I've yet to send any, but they are written. I like to think they are "simmering." I'll let you know.

I'm also deep into my new Work In Progress! After so many months of editing, it's hard to remember to write crap. I want to stop and make it perfect, and now is not the time for that. Now is the time to get the story down.

I finally went to the library and updated my card. My local library NEVER has what I want, but I can go online and order, then wait for an email to pick them up. A most awesome service! I really need to read more. I've found a bunch of free classics online as ebooks (which is sort of dumb, since I don't have an e-reader - and that means more time sitting in my office chair reading), but it's so important to read your genre. And I cannot afford new books, so the library it is. I'm glad it's there.

What about you? Do you buy new, used, library? Trade books with friends? Rob wayward B&N trucks? You can tell me....

Bringin' Ya'll Up To Date

First, The Rejectionist fucking rocks. I'm not ashamed to say it. Click those links. Click. Them.! I want The Rejectionist to be my best girlfriend, but I'm not cool enough to hang out with her, so just click the links and be done with it. Plus, she'd just think I wanted an "in" with her boss, and let's face it, I would.

Well. Let's see. The yearly list of goals to the far right of the blog. The job for May: to edit The Spiritcaster: now named Jale of Dragonfael (badass, huh? I wasn't even thinking about the title, it just came out of a clear blue sky. That's where The Hobbit came from, you know) and ready for sub. I've got a query (that my friend Wayne is messing with - go Wayne!) a 3 page synopsis (yeah, I aimed for two, but it's EPIC fantasy, people) and an 88,000 word manuscript that has been edited about five times. I also have a list of 13 agents to query (so far - tomorrow is hardcore agent search times - I foresee two pots of coffee being made). So - it looks like I get to cross that off! As to the actual querying.... deep breath... gimme a few days or weeks. :) **shudder** I will relate my successes and failures in agonizing detail, so fear not.

Now, for June! The Last Unicorn Hunter. It has both Elves and Unicorns - the death knell that some would ring against fantasy. It also has both urban and woodland settings and is, I hope, not a typical depiction of any of that. The main characters however, (think they are) human. :) There is fear in the night, a mystery, baddies from another dimension and an unexpected birth. Oh. And unicorns. Don't forget the unicorns.